Sigh. It’s true. My body feels like this:
I used to have movez!
When I try to practice moves I look at those speedy little racers and the Ferraris in my class and am really happy if I’m able to put it into first gear. Though sometimes I need to have someone help me push my car up the hill. 🙁
I realize this is what I’m starting with. I don’t have the athletic background. I have a black belt in television watching. I won the gold medal in torrents downloading. I actually have won ribbons at the fair for cross stitching. My body was permanently in park.
Now with jiu jitsu, I’ve decided it needs to move. The tires are flat, the windshield is cracked, I need a new transmission, and I need to change the oil. (There are probably much better analogies, but I’m not really a car person. If you supply better analogies, I’ll be happy to change this!) So right now I’m rejoicing in being able to hit second gear. Or to go around the corner. Or to have one single inflated wheel 🙂
Just like an old junked car, my body needs restoring. This will take time. What makes it difficult for me is trying to find that fine line between admitting truth of what my body can’t do right now and mentally giving up and just thinking I can’t do something. Does that make sense? For example, I can’t do frog jumps because I crouch down and then flat out can’t move. My body is parked. Which means it won’t move or will fall over. The problem is that I don’t know how to modify the moves in class, and there have been one or two times that I was flat out frustrated and angry, almost crying, because I just felt like I couldn’t do ANYTHING.
That’s why I really do appreciate it when my sparring partners put it into first and let me overtake them in second. In no way do I feel like they’re putting me down. I feel like they’re giving me the opportunity to do SOMETHING. It helps me not to feel emotionally beat up.
So I’m a fucking idiot because I can’t make a lamp
I’ve always been an intellectual. I was the smart kid in class. The nerdy kid who all the sports people picked on. So being around all these muscles is strange for me. Now I’m in the reverse situation–I’m the one unable to do things. I’m Brian in the Breakfast Club, who couldn’t make a stupid lamp. Need me to explain educational theories? No problem. Need me to edit that paper for you? Fo sho. Need me to write a textbook? Okies. Need me to move my hips? Ummmm. Need me to do a pushup? Ugh. Need me to move? …
And because it’s totally in my head now (If you find this as a clip, I’ll add it!):
I’m a fucking idiot because I can’t make a lamp?
No, you’re a fucking genius because you can’t make a lamp.
What do you know about trigonometry?
I could care less about trigonometry.
Bender, did you know without trigonometry there would be no engineering?
Without lamps there’d be no light.
What about you? Were you a mini or a roadster or a vwbus when you came to jiu jitsu? Were you athletic to begin with? Where are you now?
There are several major things that help you in bjj:
Skill
Strength
Speed
Flexibility
Stamina
Size
I assume you feel like you have none but the last, and can’t seem to figure out how to use that? Size you are born with, but you’ll get better at all the rest if you stick with this sport, no doubt about it. Even big guys can be speedy and flexible. Google pictures of sumo wrestlers stretching; it’s surprising. I was somewhat athletic when I started jiu jitsu, but I’m a lot more after doing it for three years. At practice, I try to improve my quickness, flexibility, and endurance to improve my bjj, but I can’t help but play to my strength. Which is . . . strength. At college, I decided that I was never going to be svelte, so I decided to be strong, and joined the powerlifting team. I was a little stronger than average when I started, but I got Really strong. The bar bends when I deadlift strong. Insecure guys are embarrassed to share the weight room with me strong. I can bench press tiny asian women strong. A good kick off the wall gets me halfway across the swimming pool strong. I can hold my own against new guys who don’t want to be tapped by a woman strong. Almost as strong as the guys strong. Did I mention I love being strong?
Okay, so I can’t lift heavy and train jiu jitsu intensely at the same time. My body gets fatigued and doesn’t do either well. You don’t need to be strong to be good at bjj, but if you can create a small space for a side control escape with good technique, you can create a bigger space with good technique and strength. I totally suck at that escape, so anything helps. Do I use strength as a crutch sometimes? Yes. Do other people use quickness and flexibility the same way? Heck, yes. Ever study the Crusades? (Fascinating part of history!) Both the Frankish knights and the Seljuk Turks were effective fighting forces, with vastly different armament and tactics. Both sides learned how best to defeat the other during the wars by playing to their own strengths and taking advantage of their opponent’s weaknesses. So, my suggestion: Pick one aspect of athleticism that will help you in jiu jitsu and that you like more than the others, or that you have the time and access to facilities to develop, and work to improve it outside of bjj practice. But if you don’t have extra time, just be persistent on the mat, and in a few years you’ll be able to make your body do a lot that it can’t do now. You don’t have to be a Ferrari to run one off the road.
Actually, I do think my size works to my advantage. I’m only 3 months in, though, so of course I have days where it feels like nothing comes together. I recognize that every body type has its advantages and disadvantages, I just sometimes need a place to work through some of my discouragement. It’s easy to feel a little down with all these muscle cars and Ramblers leaving me in the dust. ^_^
Thank you so much for your words of encouragement, as well as a breakdown of what you need for BJJ. I feel like I want to make a D&D character sheet for myself now. Hmmm…
Here are my basic stats: Str: 11, Dex: 7, Con: 8, Int: 16, Wis: 10, Cha: 15
Yep, flexibility and movement are by far the worst! ^_^ My plan is to work on flexibility next. I intend to do yoga starting next month.
Ooooh. I like that reverse triangle in your link. It’s just like a rear naked choke, but with the legs. I’m going to try that sometime. I don’t speak dungeons and dragons, but I get the idea. Enjoy yoga.
Back slowly away from the flare gun, Julia.
Ahahahahaha I actually laughed out loud about that. Thanks for making my morning funny.
Holy cow… been a long time since I’ve seen D&D anything 🙂
I’m a girl-nerd. I see the world in D&D terms.
I wrote this online once:
Prestige Class TV Fangirl Requirements 20 hours of television per week to maintain current levels. 30-40 hours of television per week to advance in levels. Proselytizing required 5-8 times per week, must addict fans to new fandoms–12 per year.Update: My DM has suspended my ability to progress in TV Fangirl due to my progression in Grappling. 🙂
Hehehe so when I think about Yoga, what I actually think is: I need to dump a bunch of skill points in yoga 🙂
Just keep training and be kind to yourself. You will get better, you will get fitter, you will adapt.
We all have limitations; some from disuse and some from injury. It just shows your mental toughness if you keep at it and persevere.
I usually am very kind to myself. Actually, the parked car thing makes me laugh. 🙂 I’m definitely not one of those negative Nancy’s who’s always bitching about what they can’t do.
Thank you for the support, though. Mental toughness is DEFINITELY there! I’ll have to write about it. Thanks for the idea 🙂
I’m working on it too, I broke my foot a couple months ago and I find that a lot of things I used to be able to do I just can’t anymore. It’s not because I don’t want to, or that I just don’t understand how to do them but because my foot has healed in a way that is different than it was before so now I have to re-learn how to use it.
I totally get how frustrating it can be.
Hi there Julia,
I just found your blog and think I found a kindred spirit. I know the feeling of having a sluggish, stiff and broken body. All you athletic types should know it as the feeling of leaving a Chinese buffet after gorging yourself on General Tso’s chicken.
Yoga helps. I started it shortly before starting BJJ (a little over a year ago) and have found the movements to be very similar. The transition from a forward bend to low plank is almost identical to that of a sprawl, for example. Many of the feelings are the same as BJJ as well. The feeling of getting a complicated pose like down dog just right (for you) is like pulling off a sweep in rolling. I’ve personally battled with serious frustration in both and spent hours after class asking myself why I bothered. The not-so-secret of it all is remembering to enjoy where you are. You get out exactly what you put in. I don’t mean that in the grand metaphorical sense either. Going into it with negative emotions will at the least waste your time.
You may be tempted to just buy a dvd. Don’t do it. Even the simplest poses are thoroughly complicated and should be performed with an instructor giving feedback. Like BJJ, going too hard, too fast, too soon will injure you.
Anyways, good luck with yoga and BJJ. Just remember you need to have five ranks in each to get the +2 synergy bonus.
PS: Please don’t cut your hair off. It looks gorgeous like it is and would probably look super cute braided or in a bun.
Hahahahahaa I LOVE the synergy comment! I totally had thought about that when I wrote this article, but didn’t have my D&D manual handy to make sure I wrote the reference correctly.
Also, thanks for the compliment! 🙂 And the yoga advice! No worries–I never considered getting a dvd. I have very low body awareness, so getting into a correct pose is hard enough with someone helping me.
Yeah…I’ve been going the pony tail route, but may try braiding again, though that’s even harder to fix on the spur of the moment.
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