Huzzah! Let’s celebrate!
Okay, what’s been going on with me:
I had surgery on my back and was told one month with no BJJ. The surgery was to remove a small epidermal inclusion cyst from the upper part of my back. I ended up with 7 stitches – 2 on the inside and 5 on the outside.
Unrelated, I was at home trying to do some exercises that would not put strain on the stitches. So I did 50 squats (25×2) and when I finished them, something felt WRONG. I couldn’t move. I went to the ER, where they took an x-ray and couldn’t find anything wrong, but they gave me pain meds and sent me on my way. I went to the back doctor and he gave me stronger meds and scheduled me for an MRI. The following day I had a strong, negative reaction to the pain killers and threw up 6 times and went back to the ER. They took me off two of the pills and gave me a few days of other pills.
That Friday I went and got an MRI. It’s not really like what they show on tv. What happened was: I had to get undressed and wear weird hospital garments. I laid on a pad, they shoved a pillow under my knees. I was told I would have to keep very still, that it would take 30-40 min, and would be very loud. A hospital man put earplugs into my ears, which by the way is a really odd sensation – having someone ELSE put earplugs in your ears. Then he put a big thing of earmuffs on my ears. I was put into the machine and light rock was piped in – at one point I heard “Honesty” by Billy Joel. Then the awfulness started. The machine was loud. Like a horrible alien probe done with sound. Or like sitting next to a jackhammer. Or like sitting next to a 15 year old boy on the subway who is wearing a death metal t-shirt and earphones so loud they sound like they’re actually speakers. Near the end it became very hard to keep my hands still and I found myself having involuntary muscle spasms in my hands/arms.
Afterward I went back to the doctor. He showed me the MRI which was so cool. Essentially on the left screen he had my spine showing, and there was a horizontal line going along it. On the right hand screen he had the cross section. At one point I found myself stifling laughter as I refrained from asking “is that a cross section of my butt?” During this time he diagnosed me with a herniated disc. He said I have some “spinal disease” in my L4/L5 vertebrae.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9LBdAwBVZg]
This video shows exactly what an MRI of a herniated disc looks like. Very informative. Also, you can see a cross section of someone’s butt. Yes, I’m 10.
He told me it would likely heal on its own in about 2-3 years and then he told me I would not be able to do BJJ for about a year. He said to relax and not exercise for that whole time.
I cried. Seriously. Okay, I’m even tearing up right now.
I felt like I’d been punched in the stomach. I was angry and upset. I kept trying to have him tell me exercises I could do to help my back heal. I felt like he kept dismissing me, saying “That will help strengthen your back but it won’t help your spine heal.” He finally showed me one exercise – McKenzie exercises, and said I could also do swimming or running or walking.
It was ironic that it came right after I posted the query: would you still do BJJ you knew you’d never make it past your current belt? I emotionally texted friends and said it made me want to chuck everything, move to Saudi Arabia, make a bunch of money and come back to Korea later. You see, one of the reasons I am staying in Korea–a BIG reason–is because I love the BJJ here.
Don’t make permanent decisions when you’re a) really hungry b) really tired c) really depressed d) really angry. I knew that was how I was feeling but I knew it would pass. Plus, my friends are very rational and let me simply vent to them.
I had no freaking clue what a herniated disc was, so I did some Internet research. I also learned the Korean for it: 허리 디스크. Your discs are basically jelly donuts between your vertebrae. A bulging disc is if the jelly donut is getting squished and pushes out but the jelly stays inside. A herniated disc is when the jelly gooshes into the spinal column which presses up against your spinal cord and causes massive amounts of pain. So: squishing + integrity = bulging. Squishing + losing goo = herniation. This paragraph brought to you by the word “squish.”
The doctor scheduled me for an epidural steroid injection that afternoon. Again, no clue what that was. The pain I was feeling was because my disc was so swollen and pressing against my spinal cord. The steroids are a strong anti-inflammation fluid into your spine so that the herniated disc can stop pushing into the spinal nerve and give you some relief.
I entered a room with a big radiation sign on it. Not a good sign (see what I did there ;)). I changed into more hospital fashion wear and laid down on this table. The table had two thick knobs near my head, which I sadly learned were for holding on to. Why sadly? Read on. The x-ray machine was so they could make sure the needles were going into the spine in the right places. The doctor dressed in a mad apron and marked my back with a pen so he would know where to inject. Why a “mad” apron? Read on.
After several x-rays to make sure they were right on, the doctor started pushing in the first needle. He would push, x-ray, push, x-ray, etc. This was uncomfortable and I held on to the bulbous handles to give my hands something to do. Then came the injection. Remembering it right now is causing me to cry and I’m having trouble breathing. I really think that if there is such a thing as a Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder brought about by an injection, that this was it. I could feel the fluid enter in, and it caused me to be acutely aware of every single nerve running through my right leg. As in it felt like he injected fire into my leg. I started screaming. Not yelling, but screaming. Like a murder victim in a horror movie who is being stabbed to death. I couldn’t stop screaming and crying. He had to stop to let me calm down before they could continue. He had to do this twice. During this time I was gripping those bulbs so hard I thought they would break. And my doctor’s apron was making me ANGRY – it was a print of fake denim patches and it looked SO STUPID. It’s possible it was the murder victim pain I was feeling that brought on those feelings.
Excuse me while I have a cry break.
At least I got my revenge on those guys – I left makeup all over their stupid table.
Afterward the doctor told me my right leg would be numb for up to 12 hours. Sure enough, zero control over it. The doctor brought me a wheelchair and a different doctor wheeled me out to a cab. Getting in my house involved leaning heavily against the brick walls and hopping. Luckily I had pulled a Mary Poppins and had brought a sturdy umbrella that could support my weight. My leg and foot felt like they were asleep. Not quite the pins and needles you get afterward, but somewhere in between. At one point I went to the refrigerator and kneeled down to get something, and my right leg gave out and I went over sideways, knocking tomatoes everywhere. Not my finest moment.
Around this time my cat was shaking her head vigorously as though to say “no, no, you MUST do BJJ” so I took her to the vet and she was diagnosed with ear mites.
Not the best week in Casa Jiu-Jiu.
Since then I have returned to work and become much more rational. I can walk, I can move, I do not have active pain. When I wake up my back is very stiff and sore, but it feels like regular lower back pain. I am taking pain killers only in the mornings.
My plan to get healthy:
First, I posted about it in Jiu Jitsu forums and got some helpful support. If you’d like to see how positive and wonderful the community is, check out my post about my herniated disc. From that post I watched a fantastic video by Rener Gracie:
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1mru33xLcDE]
I researched some exercises okay for a herniated L5 disc and crunches and pushups and jogging were all okay. So I started doing these and logging these exercises. I learned that more blood flow to the back = good. Also, me losing more weight = good.
I started doing C25K, which gets you from the couch to running a 5k by building up your stamina. The first week you run 60 seconds and walk 90 seconds and repeat for 20 minutes.
I started taking my supplements again. I’m taking my multivitamin, fish oil, Vitamin D, and glucosamine + chondroitin. Several articles I read online seem to show that these may help. I’m all about the “may” at this point.
I plan to get a second opinion. I want to talk to a doctor who is used to working with athletes. I’m coming up on the same problem that Meg had: “My experience suggests that there is a sense in the NHS that one is either a professional athlete or not – ‘true’ as far as it goes – and there is less appreciation for the lifestyle of the amateur athlete, where physical activity is integral but not the entirety of life and work.” My feeling is that my doctor is accustomed to working with normal folks who may need to just take it easy but that I really want someone who has worked with athletes and can give me clear guidelines on which exercises I should avoid, who can help me create an exercise regime and can WORK WITH ME so that my whole body doesn’t turn into a jelly donut in the next year or two.
As far as BJJ goes, here is my decision: I’m sticking with it. I’m going to stay active in the community–here in Korea, here in my blog, and here in Jiu Jitsu Forums. I’ve decided this is a GREAT time to observe other gyms within the John Frankl network here in Korea and to post the reviews here, because English speakers have a HECK OF A TIME finding BJJ gyms in Korea. My hope is that by the time I’m ready to go back on the mats I will have reviewed (AND POSTED) about all of them :).
It’s also a great time to go to class, observe, take notes, reflect, analyze, and evaluate. To continue my BJJ notebook and perfect my note-taking skills. To get my head in the game. I was directed to this great post by Allie the clear belt, about a teammate who observed classes for the two years he was unable to train. Inspirational. Also, a great time to work on my Korean – recording classes then going over it later with my tutor. I’ve also decided to start posting more Korea specific BJJ stuff. Not all of it, but some things that will be perhaps only interesting to the Korean BJJ community – like Korean BJJ jargon that I’m learning. I will also be revamping the site–making it easier to navigate, tagging things, etc.
So I am hopeful, I have not given up, and I will be active within the BJJ community during my time off the mats. And yes, I’ll go to class. After I finish this week’s lesson plans!
Thank you all for your support. I realize this is a much longer blog post than normal, but I’ve had a helluvaweek and wanted to share. Thankfully it did end well. Today I went to a great seminar – my first – and will be posting about it this week. This photo was taken tonight. I was involved, though not participating.
So now: I’m grateful for supportive friends, supportive family, supportive coworkers, the BJJ community, the commenters on this blog, anti-inflammation effects, and my cat. What are you grateful for this week?
Hey Julia,
So sorry about your back and your experience with the treatment for your injury. I can definitely relate to you regarding an MRI as me and my wife have been through them. There’s no way to describe it unless you’ve been through it yourself. Those same issues you were having regarding staying still and dealing with the noise are pretty common. Both me and my wife had the tech yelling at us to stay still. My wife had it worse because the room was so cold that she started shaking almost to the point that her teeth were chattering. Horrible.
I can’t even imagine how bad that injection was and I’m really sorry that was your experience. The good part is that the worst of it is over and now you can focus on getting better. You’re definitely right about general practicioners not being able to deal with an athlete. I found the same thing in the US. When I was having issues with my knees I ended up meeting with the doctor for the Philadelphia 76ers.
I would recommend you doing the same thing. I know Tae Kwon Do is a big martial art in Korea, maybe there’s a doctor who works with the Olympic team or one of the professional clubs who you could speak with and get advice.
You’re definitely doing the right thing by going to observe classes and other schools. That’ll keep you motivated and you’d be surprised how much you can absorb through osmosis. Who knows, you might meet other jiu-jiteiros who have had the same experience as you and can offer advice.
I know it’s hard to just sit and heal up but I can’t emphasize it enough that you should take as long as you need to heal up. Don’t rush to get back on the mats just because you want to get back on the mats. The one force in the universe that none of us can resist is time. We all age and all the injuries we suffer come back to bite us later when we are older.
I’m sure you want to keep doing BJJ up until the day you die. You won’t achieve that goal if you push yourself too hard and end up either hurting yourself worse or the injury degrading until the point that you won’t be able to do ANYTHING at all.
Just keep it in the back of your head that a jiu-jiteiro suffered necrosis of his hip joint when he was 35. He got a hip replacement and is back on the mats to the point that his training partners are shocked that he has a fake hip. Here’s the podcast where he was interviewed for your listening enjoyment: http://thefightworkspodcast.com/2009/06/28/jiu-jitsu-injury/.
As a side note, the host of the podcast, Caleb,he was going through his own recovery. He tore most of the ligaments in his knee warming up for class. He ended up with drop-foot and was off the mats for a year and a half. He’s good now and I’m sure the same will be for you.
Time does fly and before you know it you’ll be back on the mats tapping bitches.
I really want to get back on the mats. 🙁 It’s really emotionally painful sitting on the sidelines. I think I may be rushing back – which is bad. It’s just so hard to realize sometimes that while my back feels fine now, it’s artificial. I have no idea how my back ACTUALLY is right now. 🙁
Okay okay okay. More just watching.
🙁
Oh man that really sucks about the herniated disc! What a difficult thing to experience, I can’t imagine being told I couldn’t do BJJ for an extended period of time. The worse kind is where the injury is not treatable and you’re kinda wondering “okay can I go back now or not?”
*hugs*!!!!!!
And yes I do agree with the whole doctors not understanding exercise. I notice a lot of doctor’s hardly encourage exercise and would rather encourage inactivity to recuperate. My Brazil coach always says his doctor is the best (then again his doctor has a black belt in BJJ Lol) and would never recommend in activity. I guess you would be able to do stuff like the conditioning parts and maybe even some drills but maybe just lay off the rolling?
But I’m glad that you’re not quitting BJJ entirely. You would be missed!
Yeah – that’s what I’m thinking about doing – only doing about 10% of class – warm ups and if there are some straight-back drills I could do those. Everything else – just watching.
That would be so sweet to have a BJJ black belt doctor.
My back artificially feels okay now because of the steroids, which makes me feel more nervous. 🙁
I want you to feel better so much, Julia! Would heartily recommend a second opinion and if you can finance it, work with a sports physio for rehab work. As some of your respondents have said, you will get there! A clear path forward in terms of recovery really helps take the edge off the sadness/frustration around not training, as there’s goals you can chase. Routing for you!
Hey there – i was finally able to get into some more heavy duty rehab, which was nice. There is a sadness/frustration. It’s a loss. Yes, temporary, but dang it all – I miss it.
[…] all, best viewed as an opportunity, as Julia Johansen is discovering for herself with some pretty troubling back issues related to a herniated disc that she’s working through; send her your best wishes! My chin up […]
General Practicioners are just that “General” their ability to treat musculoskeletal problems is poor in most instances. Doctors don’t fair well with biomechanics, unless you find the right specialist. Its simpler of them to say cessitation of the activity is the best thing. But as dedicated athlete you can’t do that, but you also have to recognise the long game in your approach to this.
Herniated discs are the worst and Ive seen a Number of athletes, primarily rugby players with them. Ive found Most Disc herniations occur as a result of weak hip extension and weak anterior core strength while having tight hip flexors.
Tight hip flexors (psoas and rectus femoris) would tend to inhibit the hip extensor musculature (glutes, hams), which might or might not be the cause or at least a contributory factor to your lower back problems. Jiu Jitsu players spend alot of time on their backs with hip flexors working very hard, so take time to stretch them out when you can move about again pain free.
I had one client an american football player, had a triple herniation, after rest and freaking out initially, then a aggressive regime of anti rotation and anti flexion exercises he now deadlifts 200kg regularly! If you can add anti flexion and rotation exercises into your core routine.
I suggest you reading and rereading http://www.t-nation.com/free_online_article/sports_body_training_performance_repair/bulletproof_that_back and see what exercises there you might be capable of doing. Also checkout parts one and too.
Keep us posted how you get on.
Thanks for your suggestion – I started looking into the anti-flexion exercises – what a great idea. I had never really heard this before – train the movement, not the muscle. Makes a lot of sense to me.
Oh man, I’m so sorry to read this! Hopefully it will not be THAT long before you are fully recovered. Doctors always err on the side of caution, right? I’m not very good at listening to them myself. Anyway, it sounds like that’s really rough and saddening so I hope that you are doing better now and that things will be looking up soon. At least you’ve got an adorable loving kitty cat to help you through it!
Thanks. I’m doing better, definitely. My instructor has started posting videos to our Facebook/Youtube site, and is excited to have me be a semi-official video taker 🙂 So I feel more involved.
I just had a follow up and I’m pain free, and doing what exercises I can right now.
You might try some Pilates, too. I feel your pain. Staying involved despite having to sit out on the essence of the learning (mat time) is really difficult, and for as long a time as they want you to do it, even MORE difficult. I was wondering how hard it would be to design one of those quizzes (for people off the mats) on those quiz sites…what sort of BJJ learning could you design a quiz on (not counting stuff like trivia and history), I mean REAL learning? Would it be worth doing? Example, if your partner is in x position and you are in y, the following is NOT one of your options, etc. That sort of thing.
Get well very very soon – hugs!
Hahaha I like the quiz idea! That’s really cool. I like that. I think I will take that under advisement as a potential longer term activity. I’m doing squats, pushups, calf raises, planks, etc. I’m going to class and still very involved. It’s nice.
[…] my horrid spinal injection, I’ve had little to no pain. On the 1-1o pain scale they have a cute little chart: Yeah – […]
[…] My herniated disc has not meant that the pause button has been pushed on the BJJ part of my life. I’ve been going to classes, but this will not be an option for the next month. So for December I have set some goals for myself. […]
Hey, don’t know if you’ll see this but if so keep your chin up…I herniated l5-s1 a couple of years ago, had sciatica really bad. I kept up doing judo for a while but eventually had to take a complete break. My 2 cents is to take the complete rest as early as you can and you’ll be able to get back on the mat sooner, without constantly tweaking your back.
For me, even after months of sciatica it finally healed after 3 months of complete rest. I’ve since gotten back to grappling and weights, no problems for over a year and a half…but think long term, and take the rest if you need it. Good luck!
Thank you. Most of what I’m doing is just bodyweight exercises that keep my back straight/neutral – bridging, bird dogs, planks, etc.
[…] I’ve just lost too much weight. These gis hang on me. They’re huge and fall off me. Plus, right now I’m not getting a lot of action on the mats, due to my herniated disc. […]
[…] wanted to share what it was like going back to BJJ after nearly a 6 month break off the mats. I herniated a disc in my back in October 2011, and since then I’ve had physical therapy, started lifting weights, but have continued […]
[…] been back at BJJ twice, after being gone for nearly 6 months due to my herniated disc. On Saturday I made it to the huge, teamwide training and had the opportunity to roll with the […]
Hey Julia ! I just have started training BJJ in JF network (even if I am studying in France right now. I’ll be back in summer!) I have some terrible back pain and I wonder if I could continue rolling with that if I do what is necessary. During my first two weeks at the academy I had terrible back pains twice but my doctor thought it was just a muscle problem. How are your back right now? I really want to know if you are feeling better today!
Seongjun
EXCELLENT! Glad you’re part of our family!
As far as back pain goes, I feel like at this point I can generally tell if I’m having more spinal pain vs muscular pain. They feel quite different to me. It’s very possible it’s muscular, or it’s very possible it’s spinal – I’m not a doctor so I can’t tell you (nor should anyone else on the Internet!).
To answer your question: my back is doing well, but I’m ALWAYS on alert. I usually spend a bit of extra time warming it up. I like to do hip thrusts and bridging and rotating my hips. You can also do the yoga camel/cat to help stretch/move it.
Ultimately you need to listen to your body. What that means is that you might need to do some uncomfortable things, like take more breaks, only roll once every 2 rounds, or sometimes not spar. If something hurts, don’t do it! I realize that some guys have that “man up” mentality and will mock people for sitting out, but guess what – you only have one body, and it’s yours. Please take ownership of that and not let anyone pressure you into hurting yourself.
Please check back in later and tell me how you’re doing! When my back went out I couldn’t do ANYTHING. It was the most pain in my life.
So do I! I cannot stay on a chair… Thanks for the reply 🙂 I am going to see a doctor soon (in France reservations are in days after you call the doctor…) I am doing the yoga stretches every day as well as some plank exercises. You should try that too !
Hope we will get better !
Seongjun
Sitting and laying down are hard on the back. Standing is one of the times you will get more relief. I’d suggest alternating sitting/laying and walking around for 30+ minutes as much as you can.
Yay for planks! Those are great. As are bird-dogs.
[…] be wise. Yes, there are times to push through pain, and you have to know your body. For example, after herniating a disc in my back, I’ve learned the difference between spinal pain and muscular pain, and if I experience sore […]
[…] been back at BJJ twice, after being gone for nearly 6 months due to my herniated disc. On Saturday I made it to the huge, teamwide training and had the opportunity to roll with the […]
Wow thank you! I’m going through something similar. I’m a bjj nut and have a painful bulge at L5S1. I want to go back to bjj but not sure if it’s the right thing to do. I have 4 little girls, need to be a father, etc. Any chance I could befriend you on Facebook?
[…] the past few years, I’ve struggled with more invisible injuries. There was the herniated disc in my back, and more recently, my shoulder. About a year ago I noticed my shoulder felt very painful. I […]