Jiu Jitsu is a great sport, and I love it dearly, but I have to admit that there are some not-so-pleasant aspects about aggressively hugging another human being on a mat. It’s a bit different than Seymour’s list of 10 Gross Things That Happen in Jiu Jitsu, and his list of 10 More Gross Things That Happen in Jiu Jitsu. Instead, these are 5 disgusting things that I have learned (about) solely because I am a BJJ practitioner.

5. WHAT I SMELL LIKE AFTER ROLLING WITH SEVERAL MEN

Honestly, it’s really disgusting. My sweetheart once joked about wanting to cuddle with me after BJJ class and I said “Dude, smell me and THEN ask.” He then requested I take a shower. I think the smell is akin to having a cat pee on your clothes, then you leave it in an enclosed plastic bag over the weekend. BAM! STANK!

4. SWEAT IS REALLY SLIPPERY

Have you ever slipped in yours or someone else’s sweat? Nope? Before I started jiu jitsu, had you told me that I would, multiple times, slip in pools of other people’s sweat, I would have taken a NOPE rocket the hell away from BJJ town. The problem: it sucks you in and then you just find yourself dealing with it. Sigh.

3. THAT DUDE’S BEIGE GI STARTED OUT WHITE

It didn’t come in that color. Instead, his sweat and everyone else’s turned it that really nasty disgusting color. Now, go for the grips and try not to think about how gross it is.

2. WHAT IT’S LIKE TO CHOKE ON YOUR OWN SWEATY HAIR

There is a reason I cut my hair short. When you have long hair and it’s super sweaty, it acts like a curtain. When it gets in your mouth and covers your fact, it’s in fact, attempting to smother you.

1. MRSA

If seeing pictures of MRSA does not convince you to wash your belt, perhaps this article by Tangled Triangle will. Or, perhaps knowing that MRSA surpasses AIDS in the US in number of deaths each year. Was my life much happier before I knew about MRSA? HELL YEAH. Do I get weird and itchy when I find out that people don’t wash their belts? HELL YEAH.

Seriously – your belt gets dirty, sweaty, and disgusting. Jiu Jitsu is a super-close contact sport. Your belt touches my hands, my face, my neck. Please have it be clean. If your stripes fall off – replace them. The tape was not magical – it’s just freaking tape. Wash your belt.

Jiu Jiu’s Question: those are the top five most disgusting things I’ve learned (about) from BJJ. What are yours? Second, when is the last time you washed your belt?